Hello, and welcome back to my annual end-of-year post, where we take a moment to look back and reflect on the year gone by. I’ve done three of these now – this is my fourth – and I always find it funny to go back and reread my previous instalments.
They really offer an insight into where my mind was at the time. The struggles I was facing. The joys I was experiencing. If anything, they reveal just how much our circumstances can change year on year. How our mindsets shift in response to life’s lessons.
I highly recommend writing your own yearly reflections to anyone who’s stumbled upon this blog of mine. You, too, can laugh at yourself for years to come. Or, better still, maybe you may look back and be struck by the wisdom you once possessed.
On the whole, 2024, for me, has been a year of learning. I mean, which year hasn’t? But what makes 2024 unique is that I will forever remember it as the year I finally discovered my purpose.
Purpose, commonly defined as the reason something is done or a person’s sense of resolve or determination – in other words, the ‘why’ behind the ‘what’ – can take people a lifetime to figure out. This isn’t to be confused with passion, which is something that inspires great enthusiasm within an individual.
We can have many passions in life; I have a passion for reading, acting and writing. But we can only have one purpose; mine is to tell stories. The real trick is using your passions to serve your purpose.
A lack of purpose is often the reason behind the phenomenon known as a mid-life crisis. People who’ve spent most of their life coasting through, following a path set by others, finally have to reckon with the fact they never discovered their purpose, leading them to make rash decisions like leaving their job or buying a yacht, sometimes both.
It’s the inspiration behind many a suburban comedy. But it’s not really that funny. It’s pretty sad, if we’re honest. Society has become so consumer-driven, with most people becoming so focused on attaining wealth and status that they never realise they don’t actually like what they do to attain it.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s a privilege to discover your purpose. Most people are never afforded the time and place to do so. This is primarily the result of circumstance.
The harsh reality is that education – the most opportune time to discover one’s purpose – is not something everyone in the world can access. However, in the UK, a country where education is free, I’d venture the lack of purpose discovery is the result of a flawed paradigm.
As it stands, young people are being funnelled into careers they have no purpose for. Some just follow where their grades take them, which can be a good indication of passion, but without a sense of purpose behind it can often leave talented people questioning their entire life trajectory.
Just look at how many young doctors are leaving the medical profession; some even start a medical degree with no intention of working as a doctor once they graduate. Instead, doing it because “that’s what my teachers said I’d be good at.”
Others – the smarter ones or dumber ones, depending on how you look at it – fool themselves into thinking they’re doing it because they want to “help people.” I’m sorry, but that’s just not a good enough reason to slog through a five-year degree followed by crappy pay; anyone can help people, so why is it that you, in particular, need to do a medical degree to do it?
High achievers aside, most other young people are just coasting through life with no greater ambition than to grab as big a slice of the pie as possible and then some. Just walk into any major London investment firm, and you will see this all being played out at its most extreme. But it happens in almost every career; people have turned into robots, willing to bend over backwards for that big promotion.
There’s nothing wrong with ambition, but if the only reason behind it is to acquire more wealth and status, then why not do something else with your time? Why are you following that particular path to greatness and not another? What’s the ‘why’ behind the ‘what’?
The sad reality is that the vast majority of young people won’t be able to give you an answer. This then begs the question: what were they doing in school in the first place?
Notice earlier I used the term flawed ‘paradigm’ rather than flawed ‘system’. The dark truth is that the system isn’t flawed. It’s working just as intended.
The longer we can stave off people discovering their purpose, the longer we can keep them locked in collective psychosis with the belief life is all about wealth and status accumulation; the longer we can maintain the false idol of consumerism.
It’s the paradigm – the prevalent worldview – that’s flawed. Not the system.
So, how do we combat this? Well, what better way to rebel against the existing paradigm than to discover your purpose and relentlessly pursue it in the face of all those calling you crazy?
We must now reckon with the central question: how do I discover my purpose?
I use the word ‘discover’ for good reason. Purpose isn’t something you create out of thin air. Rather, you must unearth it, like ancient treasure hidden beneath the sands of your consciousness.
Often, it can be staring us right in the face; we may not see it just yet. But, trust me, it’s there. It always has been. You just need to take the time to grab a shovel and start digging.
So, where do we start?
Remember how I talked about the difference between purpose and passion at the start of this post? Most people know what their passions are – the things that inspire great enthusiasm.
Unfortunately, British culture doesn’t accept people being overly enthusiastic about anything – I think it might have to do with the weather – so we tend to hide our passions for fear of being seen as too arrogant or annoying like Americans.
But I’m sure if you took some time to really think about the things that move you. The things that make you want to get up in the morning and live life. The things that you could talk about until your lungs collapse, you will find your passions.
So, step one is to ask yourself: what inspires great enthusiasm within me?
Broadly speaking, there are two categories of things that inspire great enthusiasm – and I’m leaving out other people because we’re not talking about that kind of passion. These are interests and skills.
To discover your purpose, you must acknowledge your skills and interests. And don’t be humble about them. You’ve been blessed with these gifts; they make you unique, and if you use them wisely, they can bring you that greatness everyone covets so much, so why shouldn’t you be shouting about them?
My interests include history, politics, philosophy, south Asia, Islam, Star Wars, movies, novels, and the list goes on. My skills include writing, acting… Honestly, that’s about it, but I make it work.
What’s interesting about this is that I had these passions from a very young age. So, if you’re struggling to determine your passions, I’d recommend looking to your childhood.
As a child, I used to shoot home videos and edit them using Windows Movie Maker. There exists a video of me fighting boxes of cardboard with a lightsaber, which I aptly entitled Star Wars: Attack of the Cardboard. I also used to create stick figure drawings depicting great dynastic struggles between ninjas, dragons, knights, cowboys and all other manner of fairytale creatures.
Looking back, it seems obvious I’d end up as a storyteller, but I’d forgotten all about it during my whole time in secondary education, instead focusing on maths and science rather than fostering my passions. It’s only now, looking back, that I’ve made the connection. The passion has always been there; it just got clouded by the expectations of others.
Often, when we ask children what they want to be when they grow up, we never take them seriously. But I reckon we probably should. Maybe, if we did, we’d have a lot more astronauts.
So, now that we know what they are, how do we turn our passions into purpose?
Remember when I was roasting medical students and talked about how wanting to “help people” wasn’t a good enough reason. Well, I stand by it. It’s not good enough, but it is on the right track. It’s just not specific enough. Neither does it actually explain why they need to be a doctor. However, the essence of helping others is there, and that’s the key to turning passion into purpose.
Purpose is what bridges the gap between passion and service. To turn our passions into purpose, we must find a way to make them serve mankind. That’s the key to living a fulfilling life.
By satisfying our enthusiasms and serving others, we scratch both itches. We get the best of both worlds: we get to be selfish and altruistic at the same time.
But why should we care? Why is service so important?
We all know that feel-good feeling we get whenever we help an elderly person with their shopping, buy a homeless person a meal, or donate our hard-earned money to charity. Undoubtedly, something intrinsic to the human soul exists that makes us feel lighter after being of assistance. Makes us feel valuable. Makes us feel like our existence is worthwhile. There’s a reason pretty much every major world religion places value on serving others.
Notice how when making a meal for others, you always put in a little extra care and attention than when making one for yourself. You work that little bit harder. You go that extra mile. You feel a bit better about yourself while doing it.
That’s called motivation. And it’s always more effective when you see how your actions serve and benefit others. Money can definitely motivate people, but what do you do once you have enough of it? Buy a yacht?
Eventually, money and status cease to be effective motivators once they’re attained. On the other hand, service can keep you fueled until you reach the stars.
So, to find your purpose, you must find the link between your passions and service. The end goal doesn’t have to be grand, like ending starvation or curing cancer – although these are still lofty and respectable goals – but it must draw on your most favoured passions. Otherwise, you will lose enthusiasm and give up prematurely. Most importantly, it must clarify how the things that make you intrinsically unique benefit those around you.
Not only will this drive you to work harder on your goals, but it will also help you see the value in your own existence. It will make you more accountable, forcing you to hold yourself to a higher standard.
It also makes decision-making a whole lot easier. Once you’ve discovered your purpose, you can easily make decisions based on whether they serve your greater purpose or your lesser ego.
In short, purpose is combustion. Passion is your oxygen; don’t choke it. Service is your fuel; don’t forget it. Once lit, it will light a fire that never burns out. And if harnessed correctly, it can take you places you never dreamed of.
So, when did I discover my purpose? When did I light the fire? This finally brings us back to what this whole post is supposed to be about: 2024.
2024 was an interesting year. If I’m being honest, the start wasn’t great. I was stuck in a rut that I had carried over from the previous year. One that I recognise was all my own doing but still hopeless nonetheless. Simply put, I was going through my Tom Hansen era, and that’s all I’ll say about the matter.
However, like with all hardship, there’s always light at the end of the tunnel. And this particular light came in the form of a single week in February. The week that changed my life.
For long-time readers of this blog, you’d know I’ve known my passions for a long time. I’ve made no secret of the fact I have a passion for storytelling. However, only this year did I finally become cognisant of the link between my passion and service that allowed me to discover my purpose.
In February, I participated in a research and development project for a new play called Sounds of an Empire at Soul City Arts in Sparkbrook. It explored the history of Qawwali and its link to Birmingham.
For those who don’t know, Qawwali is a form of devotional music originating from the Islamic Sufi traditions of south and central Asia. The most famous Qawwali singer in the world was Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan, and funnily enough, when he launched his international career in the 1980s, he made Birmingham his base.
Over the week, we developed the script, blocked out the scenes and put together a one-night show bringing together video interviews and a live Qawwali band to augment the theatre performance. I was one of two actors, the other being Mim Shaikh.
It was my first time working alongside an established actor, and I owe a lot of my confidence in the craft to him. When he could’ve easily brushed me aside, Mim was instead a source of immense encouragement and wisdom, teaching me the intricacies of life as an actor.
Our writer, Mustafa Choudhry, encouraged me to follow through on doing a master’s in creative writing. He was the one who suggested I should apply for an Aziz Foundation scholarship. And, of course, our director, Sameena Hussain, taught me so much about the effort and dedication it takes to put together a memorable show for an audience.
When Friday night came around, I was buzzing with nervousness and excitement. Until this point in my career, I had only ever done screen acting, so it was my first time performing for a live paying audience. However, as soon as I got up on stage and felt that surge of emotion from the crowd, I was utterly immersed in the moment.
Sitting up there on that stage, delivering a monologue and telling a story with all those eyes staring at you, hanging on your every word, was an out-of-body experience I’d never had before. There’d be bits where my character would say a joke, and then I’d be hit with this intense ripple of laughter, an exhilarating rush of energy to bounce off. As soon as the show was over, all I ever wanted was to go up and do it again.
After our performance, audience members approached me, some of whom knew Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan personally, telling me how my work made them feel represented. How by telling their story, I had inspired and empowered them. To feel the power of story in such a direct way, the way it moves people, giving them a sense of dignity, was so viscerally overwhelming.
Nothing compares to that feeling of being so engrossed in the interconnectedness of our collective humanity. I felt like the grand design was being opened up to me, the entire universe laid bare, recognising that even though I’m a minuscule part in Allah’s painting, it still wouldn’t be complete without my colour.
It was then that I realised my purpose and how I could utilise my passions to serve others.
Simply put, my purpose is to utilise my passion for storytelling to entertain, educate and inspire. Drawing on my deep interests in history, philosophy, and Islam, alongside my talents and leverage as an actor and writer, I aim to create narratives that uplift communities and question the status quo to empower others and elicit positive change.
There you have it. My mission statement. Loud and clear. Sure, I may not be a doctor, but my existence still serves a purpose.
If there’s one week in life I would want to live on repeat, it would be that week at Soul City Arts. Never have I been more engrossed, focused, and committed to anything than when I was working on Sounds of Empire.
It really shifted my perspective on life. It was my call to action; since then, I’ve tried my best to answer it. Now, whenever I make a decision, it always comes back to my purpose and whether the decision I’m making will honour it. In the months since then, I think I’ve done a pretty good job of it. Insha’Allah, I can keep that up for the new year.
Anyhow, that’s enough from me this year. Thank you for taking the time to read this. It’s been a long one.
I hope you have a great new year, dear reader. May 2025 light a fire in your belly, the same way 2024 lit one in mine. See y’all in 2025!
Peace be with you.
Thank you for sharing this thoughtful, deeply personal, and simply articulated analysis. It not only reflects your own perspective but also sheds light on such fundamental aspects of human nature that resonate with all of us on a profound level.
Happy New Year Aqil, great write up! Yes, it is definitely to do with the weather haha